Couples counselling gets a bad rep sometimes. People think it means there must be something seriously wrong with the relationship or that it will never work. But often, these preconceived notions are simply myths, not reality. Let’s debunk some of the most common myths about couple’s therapy:
Myth #1: Admitting you need counselling means your relationship has failed
This myth likely stems from the cultural stigmas around therapy in general. But going to counselling doesn’t mean you or your relationship has somehow “failed.” It shows self-awareness, maturity, and strength to recognize when help from a therapist could benefit your situation. All relationships hit bumps occasionally; getting counselling just displays your commitment to overcoming challenges together. An objective third party brings a perspective you lack when tensions or past hurts have you triggered and reactive. Successful spouses aren’t magically drama-free – they create an “us vs. the problem” mindset and bravely face issues head-on as a team rather than judging or blaming each other. View counselling as an opportunity for personal and relationship growth, not a final admission of defeat.
Myth #2: Your counsellor will take sides or judge you
A good counsellor’s role is to be a balanced source of support, not an adversary. Their job isn’t to determine right or wrong but to get both sides heard, find underlying needs/interests, and coach healthy conflict resolution. They see you both as human beings with good and bad qualities, not “the bad guy” and “the victim.” They understand relationships involve two imperfect people learning together. Strict ethics of confidentiality also bind your counsellor and won’t share private details outside sessions. You should feel free to be honest without fearing your counsellor becoming biased later. They focus on moving you as a couple to a better tomorrow, not dredging up past mistakes to assign blame. Trust the open communication process they create and let go of worrying about judgments.
Myth #3: It’s embarrassing to tell friends or family you’re in counselling
Counselling has become way more common and socially acceptable than even decades ago. Most people know someone close to them who has benefited from therapy. While discussing your private matters is optional, don’t feel ashamed simply for trying to improve your bond. Frame it positively – you’re investing in your relationship’s health. And as more celebrities, influencers, and everyday folks share their therapy journeys, the stigma continues to lessen. Choose counselling as a wise decision rather than something to conceal or be self-conscious about from outsiders. Your relationship’s well-being is more valuable than conforming to outdated notions. Feel proud for valuing your partner and commitment enough to do the work.
Myth #4: Counselling is a waste of money if you end up separating
While saving a troubled relationship is every counsellor’s hope, the goal is making sure both people move forward in a mentally/emotionally healthy way – even if that means accepting irreconcilable differences. In these situations, counselling and/or psychologist services provide invaluable lessons that improve your ability to build happiness in future bonds, set boundaries, communicate respectfully during disagreements and co-parent harmoniously if children are involved. Rather than view the money as “wasted” because your relationship did not last, focus on clarity you can gain from having a direction as well as the growth that may follow this challenging life transition. Most past clients are still grateful for the coping strategies and insights gained, even years after counselling ended. Your investment improves your life regardless of the relationship’s fate.
Overcome Your Challenges and Grow Closer Together – Counselling Works
The bottom line is that while counselling isn’t guaranteed to “fix” you or your relationship, it provides a supportive, structured environment to confront issues, switch up unhealthy communication patterns, and compromise thoughtfully on differences – which drastically increases your chances of overcoming whatever challenges brought you in.
Choice Point Psychological Services can help couples in Calgary move forward. We offer several services, including cognitive behaviour therapy. You and your partner are worth making informed decisions that could bring you peace and closeness in the long run.
Whether you need cognitive behaviour therapy or couples counselling, we are ready to help the Calgary community. Call us today to learn more about our therapy sessions.
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